4 Signs You Need to Work on Your Marriage

a man and woman kissing

Long-term relationships are hard, whether you’re married or have been together for more than a few years. It can be a challenge to keep the passion alive, especially when you have to think about responsibilities like housework and finances. Even those with the best of intentions can end up harboring resentments and wasting quality time with their spouse or partner by talking about the logistics of life together. The past year or so has been a tough time for many, with lockdown measures taking all the passion out of what used to be a great sex life. Are you wondering how you can become a better husband or wife? Do you wish you had the skills to make a long-term relationship or marriage work? If so, read on for some of the best ways to get started.

1. Take the time to pick out thoughtful gifts.


The ins and outs of daily life can really get in the way of a successful marriage. Little resentments pile up, and suddenly you’re arguing about whether you should have pizza or lasagna for dinner. How did this happen? Remember when you spend all your time thinking up a great way to pamper your spouse or partner? Those days don’t have to be in the past. Sometimes, all it takes is a special gift to make your spouse know that you’ve been thinking of her.

Maybe it’s been a while since you picked out a filigree engagement ring and got down on one knee. Well, you don’t have to go all-in for new jewelry to impress your spouse, but you should get something that will take her breath away—especially if there’s a special occasion coming up. Take a peek in her jewelry box: does she prefer white gold, rose gold, or platinum? What kinds of gemstones is she attracted to? Maybe she’ll be excited to have a ring with a center diamond that compliments her filigree engagement ring or wedding band. This is, of course, not an everyday gift for your spouse, but it can be a great way to jumpstart the conversation and let her know that your marriage is a big deal to you.

2. Try to be a good listener.


Being an active listener is the best form of foreplay. Really. Non-stop confrontations and disagreements will kill your intimacy every time, and as long as you’re bringing negative energy, you can go ahead and say goodbye to your sex life. Even if it feels like your spouse is only talking about your weaknesses, being an active listener is the best way to a successful marriage in the long run. Try to understand why she’s in a bad mood. What’s going on at work? Are all the little things, like chores, making dinner, and other housework, overwhelming her? Is she experiencing career regret? Be one of her most cherished confidants, and you’ll be able to support her in the way she most needs. You can be the great husband who turns her bad day into a great day.

3. Random compliments can go a long way.


Your spouse doesn’t have to be all dolled-up for a gala, wearing all of her yellow gold and diamond rings, for you to hand out compliments. Little things, romantic gestures that don’t take much effort, will make her feel seen and care about. Send her a text in the middle of the day with heart emojis. Offer encouragement if she has a hard time at work. Take care of all the details for date night. Send her flowers for no reason. All of these little romantic gestures will make her smile, and that’s what being a good husband is all about, right?

Being a good husband, or even a great husband, doesn’t have to be hard. Whether you’re in a rut and need to spice things up or need to practice the art of active listening, there are positive things that you can do to get your relationship back on track. Take a deep breath, get a babysitter, and have a great time making your sweetheart feel like the special lady she is.